"As kingfishers catch fire, dragonflies draw flame; / [ . . . ] Each mortal thing does one thing and the same: / Deals out that being indoors each one dwells; / Selves -- goes itself; 'myself' it speaks and spells, / Crying 'What I do is me; for that I came'." --Gerard Manley Hopkins

30 September 2008

Taunted Again

My muse had hidden herself for quite some time until the recent full moon. That morning she greeted me in soft ivory, lighting up the rag-tag remnants of clouds that had made their way across the South from the latest hurricane . From the day after that to the last visible sliver two mornings ago, she taunted me with icy brilliance in a star-studded sky, beauty to take the breath and deepen all known and hidden longings to follow her call . . .

But taunting it was, as ideas flooded my mind with no energy, no time, no space physical or emotional, to pursue any of them into more words on a page than now-illegible or incoherent notes. And so, the urgent still filling my days, helpless hopelessness has led to lassitude, with its familiar omens of the lurking darkness that always haunts me . . .

8 comments:

Barn Swallow said...

Dear teacher,

I sit and pray for words to give you.
But perhaps, I should pray, instead,
that He will send you His own words—
let you glimpse again the chariots of fire,
the ravens and their bread,
the pilgrim-springs that make the valley sing—
and so give you your words
and a flake of eternity in which to free them.

alaiyo said...

Wow, thank you, barn swallow; what lovely thoughts. May I ask if I know you, and/or how you found inscapes? I really appreciate this encouragement, especially today.

barn swallow said...

I'm tempted to say something like "I am your guardian angel," but I won't :). I learned about inscapes when you told us about it in creative writing class, I think. You said since we were sharing our writing with you, you would let us read some of yours, if we wanted. I've really enjoyed being able to hear your voice in your writing even after graduation.

Thanks for all you do. You have helped me see life in a deeper way.

Elena

alaiyo said...

Ah, Elena! I am not surprised at the beauty and thoughtfulness of your words, then! Thank you again, and God bless. It is always easy to teach those who desire to learn . . .

Andrew J. Goggans said...

If there is anything I can do to help please let me know but since I doubt there is much of anything I can do but pray, please take comfort in knowing that you are often lifted up ion the prayers of myself and your other students, past and present.

I love you.

Ever at Your Service, Andrew

alaiyo said...

Thank you, Andrew. Your care means a great deal and encourages me often.

God bless --

predictablepoet said...

*shiver*

If nothing else, take comfort in the knowledge of your kindred words' power to call out in the heart language of another's taunted soul. You once told me that when I find myself unable to write--REALLY WRITE--, I should write about that inability. This post proves that exercise's power.

What sparks God has put into language--and what amazing ability he has given some to strike those sparks!

Thank you.

alaiyo said...

Thank you, my dear Megan!

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